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Ramblings of an angry gnome

What is this city coming to?!
Today I was almost ran over by six huge dwarves, eleven gigantic humans, seventeen monstrous elves and a city-sized tauren!!
I may not be very big, but those stupid people should be more careful about where they walk!
That lunatic of an elf with the horrible long green beard was going at almost 0.0067056 kilometres a second!
They should have a speed limit in this place!
That’s what I tried to tell the guards, but they didn’t even look at me!!
They must have been deaf!
I may not be very big, but I talk loud when I have to!!
Perhaps they only allow deaf people to join the guards!
Perhaps they are afraid people will tell them things that will turn them in to traitors or something!
How obtuse can you get?!!
Gnomes like me deserve more respect around here!!!

But there is more!
Yesterday I was listening to those Scarlet nincompoops’ yapping!
That kind of talk is like the stuff murlocks throw up!!
Since when is a gnome a kind of rat?! They are way behind on their zoology studies!!
They should throw each of those disgusting Trogg-heads in to the canal for the giant crocolisk to eat!!!
And what about that absurdly stupid journal of theirs?
Their ‘journalists’ must be the most idiotic, feeble-minded, senseless, blockheaded bunch of flabbergasting rubbishologists since Clucky McCluckers, the amazing headless chicken!!!

And what about that pyramid, they decided to hang up in front of the city during the fire festival thing?
What kind of tasteless baboon chose it? It has nothing to do with the theme of the festival! It would be much more adequate during Hallow’s End!
And did anyone notice those rude skeleton people?
I was walking down old town, when suddenly one of them jumped in front of me and started making the most dreadful noise ever! I complained at it till my throat was sore but that rude thing wouldn’t budge! In fact, it started attacking me! But I kicked it in the knee and it fell to the ground unable to walk!!

Regards:
((illegible signature))

Scarlet Missionariy Ruines Wedding!

One hot summer night in June...

It was a glorious day in Darnassus, as two paladins got married, Milos and Calirzy.

It was gonna be an event to remember for the Alliance and for the couple, as whole guilds were there, wearing finely made suits and dresses. The Temple of the Moon was packed with humans, dwarfs, gnomes, elves and their pets. When the proest came, a member of the Scarlet Missionary called Cranston was spoiling the wedding, shouting things out. The Scarlet spoiled the day, but the wedding was great.

Signature: Candalf Sunleaf

Anonymous letter #1

Well. I've been hearing about some Scarlets saying "Davinrad" and "Dead".

It seems that he's been upsetting them lately, and he's dissapeared. His last known location was by the Mail Box in Stormwind. I think the Scarlets have murdered him.

Anonymous letter #2

Snorkyorky has been acused of rigging The Snorkyorky End of Year Awards by letting his friends be at the top of the vote for know.

The Awards voting will be open until January. For more info check the World of Warcraft forum.

Snorkyorky said: "People have been voting and that's what has come out. I never rigged it!"